Motivation

Motivation: What does it take?

If you offer your kid a dollar, will he do his homework? If you offer a hundred dollars, will your teen get A’s for the semester? How about if you offer a Klondike Bar; what will he do? Not interested? It just goes to show that like so many things in learning, motivation is not one size fits all.

In a discussion with one of my contractors this week, we talked about a mama who was dissatisfied with a lot of teachers. She felt that they weren’t living up to their responsibilities. So the question arose, when it comes to motivation, whose job is it to motivate your teen?

It would be nice if your teen were totally self-motivated. In fact, some people believe kids should be responsible for their own motivation, and to a degree that’s true. Awesome mamas may know what motivates their teens part of the time, but it’s rare that a mama can motivate her teen 100% of the time.

Each of us does things for different reasons.

From the American Psychological Association, I’ve learned about the Situated Expectancy-Value Theory. It’s fascinating because it backs up the value of study skills besides just motivation. The following quotation will help you understand the theory, “Learners’ motivation is shaped by three factors, captured by the following questions: Can I do this? Do I want to do this? And, what are the costs? In other words, motivation depends on whether students feel confident to engage in a task, find value in it, and perceive minimal costs during the learning process.”

“Can I do this?” is a question that we all may ask before doing something difficult. But you can get on the internet and find literally millions of videos with teens doing incredible aerials on bicycles and skateboards. You can find kids conducting experiments just to see what will happen. Why are teens willing to take these chances and risks but not do their homework?

Teens record nearly everything on their phones, including things like their awesome bicycle jumps. But it’s important to remember a teen may easily have been riding for ten years. Mama, you may have been the one running beside him until he learned to ride when he was little. Since those first rides by himself, he may have tried a hundred tricks you’ve never seen. You gave him the confidence to ride. You let him know it was possible.

Confidence is part of motivation. There’s a huge difference between “I CAN do this” and “I CAN’T do this.” Does your teen look at homework and say, “I can’t do this.” Uh oh. Why not? Maybe it’s because you can’t stand beside him in every class and hold onto the bike until he’s ready to go…

But let’s be clear, there are supports available. If your teen knows how to take good notes, assignments get easier. If she knows how to self-advocate and ask questions, she knows how to support herself. If he’s learned grit and resilience to keep getting up when he falls off his bike, he’s got to learn to do the same thing in class.

Help your teen to see the little wins along the way. If there aren’t some little wins, get him help, like a tutor, before he begins to think he can’t learn. If your son never made it down the driveway on his bike, he definitely couldn’t have done that jump!

Note taking, self-advocacy, and grit and resilience are study skills that can help your teen acquire little wins. They help build up that confidence to take risks and answer the question, “Can I do this?” with a strong “yes.” That confidence helps motivate your teen to learn.

The first question in the Situated Expectancy-Value Theory has been answered. So, what about motivation and question number 2, “Do I want to do this?” There are a LOT of things teens do want to do: sports, video games, and spending time with friends for example. When it comes to “Do I want to do this homework?”, most teens say, “no.”

How can the answer be turned into a “yes?”

In part, I answer this question with rewards. Before you get steamed up and say that’s expensive, I’m NOT talking about monetary rewards.

Think about what matters to your teen, what she would rather be doing than homework or any type of learning. One student I work with loves to read. She would rather read than do homework. However, she knows that some of her homework helps her read better. She’s learned that with study skills her homework goes faster, and as a consequence, she has more time to read. For her, that’s a sweet reward.

There’s no reason that another teen can’t complete homework for one class and reward himself with 15 minutes of hoops, music, or videos. He’ll have to learn to limit the reward time until he’s done with his work, and that may take some help from mama, but it’s definitely doable.

The “do I want to do this” question can also be answered by goals. Sometimes, we do things we don’t want to for a higher purpose. If your teen’s goal is to become a doctor, she has to learn biology. Medical school often requires high scores. Her goal will help motivate her to do her homework and do well in studies if she uses the steps we talked about last month.

Goals and rewards can swing the pendulum to “Yes, I want to do this.”

The final question has to do with cost. Everything has a cost. It can be monetary, time, effort, or something else of value. In economics choosing one thing instead of another is opportunity cost. So, when we’re talking about motivation, is it worth it to get up and do something or better to stay where you are?

We make decisions like this ALL day long. We may choose to wash the dishes instead of watching a tv show. Maybe we do yard work instead of playing a game with the kids. Your teenager may choose gaming over homework.

If we’re shortsighted, maybe gaming is more fun than that homework, but what will we get for gaming in the long run? Not every decision has to be made with the future as a guide, but many do. If your teen does this today, how will it affect tomorrow? Plan for your future self.

If doing my homework makes mama happy, what does that do for me? It may sound cold, but it’s easier to do things for a person who does things for you. Ideally, your teen will learn to see what has more value and take action to gain that value. There is a caveat here. Everyone has their own value system. If you want your teen to be motivated to learn, she must see the cost of learning to be lower than what is competing with learning.

Study skills make learning easier. Because of that, the cost of learning drops and will more likely outcompete other choices your teen makes. For example, your son may be more willing to do homework or study for that test because it takes less time. He knows the likelihood of going on an outing with his dad increases when he’s doing well in school.

There are a lot of pieces that have to fall into place to help teens become motivated to learn. Just know that as a mama, you play an integral role. Your thoughts, your ideas, and your actions affect your child every day.

If you’re ready to take the next step in helping your teen become more motivated, let’s talk!

Forever Learning,

Jessyka Coulter

CEO & Founder, Ace Cookie Tutoring