Soft Skills Article

Soft Skills: Who Needs ‘Em?

The Answer: EVERYBODY

Soft skills: what are they, and why are they called soft?

Soft skills are so important that many people believe they should be called professional skills. Every job requires them, and employers are looking for them in every candidate they interview. But, that doesn’t answer what they are.

Soft skills are skills that cannot be measured as definitively as hard skills. A hard skill could be how many words you type per minute. It’s a technical skill that can be easily measured and easily taught. A soft skill is the customer service agent who is able to calm down an angry customer and make her feel appreciated. Another soft skill is a manager who is able to get a department to work together because she knows how to use each person’s skill set to best advantage.

How do you measure that? That’s why a soft skill is NOT the same thing as a hard skill.

Soft skills were named by the army in the 1960s when army officers realized it took more than hard or technical skills to win an offensive. The army may have learned about soft skills 60 or so years ago, but mamas have known since the beginning of time that it takes soft skills to make a family run well.

One of the most important soft skills is communication. When you talk to your kids, you may speak differently to one than you do another. It’s not about favorites or spoiling one and not the other. It is about reaching your child, making him understand. As a mama, you know what works best with each of your children. In the same way, your kids have learned how best to talk to you, and there’s a good chance it’s different from the way they talk to dad.

In addition to talking, communication is about listening.

There’s an old saying about “reading between the lines.” Whether you are listening to your teens describe school or talking about their friends, there is a lot being said without words. This is a skill that some people do better than others, but it is one worth developing. There is a caveat, though. Reading between the lines means you’re making inferences, guesses. Be sure you know those guesses are correct before you react! It’s best to start with the phrase “Tell me more” or “That’s interesting” before jumping to conclusions.

Communication skills are also the skills that grow into presentation skills. You’ve seen great speeches and not so great speeches. What’s the difference?

It could be the tone of voice or even the words that were used. Presentation skills are something that can be learned. You can learn when you need to be firm, when you need to soften your tone, and even whether to smile or frown. If you’re naturally a soft spoken person, you have to learn to speak up, but it doesn’t mean you’ll never have the presentation or public speaking soft skill. Communication skills can be learned by teens, mamas, … anyone!

Communication is a part of almost every soft skill. Teamwork is another soft skill, but it CANNOT work without communication.

I won’t lie. For me personally, teamwork can be difficult. Yet, I know I’m not the only one who doesn’t always like to let go of the reins lol My contractors are working to make me into a better team player, and, as such, I’m better at helping teens know how to be successful in groups. Becoming successful in teams takes both sides of communication, speaking and listening. But without a willingness to be a part of a team, it can never successfully happen.

Employers know that.

Few people work entirely alone, so teamwork matters. Collaboration is teamwork. Sometimes teamwork shows up in accountability. Who doesn’t know a guy who takes credit for the work a group did when he didn’t do anything? He won’t be able to slide forever... As a teen or adult, nobody will want him in their group knowing he does nothing. Eventually, not doing your part catches up to a person.

Accountability is a huge component of a great work ethic as is completing work as promised. For a teen, work ethic might mean completing assignments well and when they are due. Traits like punctuality and reliability are also part of a person’s work ethic. Having a strong work ethic shows others you are dependable and can increase your credibility. You get to decide how you show up, how you present yourself to others. Be the one who everyone says is a hard worker. You’re more likely to get that promotion :D

These soft skills, customer service, communication, teamwork, presentation skills, and a good work ethic will take you far. Once you’ve got them under your belt, consider developing your creative side. Being able to look at things differently may help you come up with solutions others don’t see. Problem solving is another soft skill to be appreciated. Remember the customer service rep who calmed the angry customer? Most likely, she solved a problem.

Soft skills are something that mamas and their teens need to develop but will likely never be taught in school. Few professions are exclusively soft skills, but pretty much every profession benefits when people have them.

When in doubt about the importance of soft skills, remember, “They may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel.”

Forever Learning,

Jessyka Coulter, CEO of Ace Cookie Tutoring